Thursday, 22 October 2009

Gloria's Futile Attempt On My Life

I received the following message through Chowq's very own SLUTMAIL system today. Don't you dare laugh (or 'LOF', as my chemistry teacher put it) because it is true; they DO have something going at this WHERE PATHS INTERSECT thing!

The following message was sent (count that) ten times! Spam, chain letters, junk mail, what is this Chowq Stuffed?

Must you resort to such tricks now to test me? Is this you Dakter Torn-Ronto disguised as Miss Kassu? Is that you 9MM Pistoll Poet checking my Taqwa oil level? Stop this at once I warn you! Face me directly, madmen and whirlers!


From: onetobe
To: tahir
Date: Mar 14, 2009 Sat 06:31 am


How are you today, i hope that you are doing fine as i am feeling alright also,My name is, gloria, I am very good looking and pretty girl,sincere and trusted, God fearing, Dear it was very great when i got your profiles,and i feel a great joy in my heart withing me to be interested on you despite that i have not seen you in person but your profiles really gave me a nice pleasure to communicate with you. and I hope you will be the true loving, honest and caring man that I have been looking for, And I have something special to tell you about me, So please contact me directly through my email address at ( ) so that I can also send my picture directly to you. I will be waiting for your response.

Yours ever gloria

My reply:

Now listen Gloria,

Be a good Christian. Why are you a desperately seeking Susan? Did you receive very little attention as a child then? YOU have a big problem, I don't, and I don't see how that can posssibly be any of MY problem.

Please contact the prime alpha male, Dr. Safwan Shah, or other Chowq beta half-men who sleep at their desks.

Attempting to further contact me will not give you any pleasure I assure you since I am not the man you're looking for. You see, I have already been booked for life by someone very special. Sorry, but that's the whole truth.

Goodbye forever.

PS: Shame on you if that's really you two up in Torn Ronto!

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