The previous article, The
Advantages Of Group Rides, explored various aspects of cycling group rides; it is time now to analyse all the disadvantages.
"Madness in individuals is rare but in groups, it is the rule".
— (Friedrich Nietzzche)
If a group rider lacks discipline and attentiveness on the road,
he surely will learn the hard way. If he gets easily distracted and cannot hold
the desired speed or course, crashes are his destiny. After years of riding, I
have observed the following to be true. Read on.
Snobbery on wheels
Members of cycling groups tend to promote exclusivity
by remaining in their comfort zones and choosing not to casually ride with
others. Riders who cannot beat them, usually join them. I beat most I
encountered and decided not to join them.
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Just because some prefer riding alone must not mean they are
lesser cyclists in terms of speed, performance or power. Several years ago
I overtook someone riding a Pakistani steel bike. I noticed he had modified it
for speed by removing the mudguards and having two hand-grips welded to the
spot where the head-tube met the top of the fork.
Just when I thought he was far behind, he speedily overtook me, holding the hand-grips in ‘race’ position, with a non-aero shalwar-qameez flapping about in the wind but display no apparent loss of power. Being at the tail-end of my 50-km ride, I was unable to overtake him despite going full throttle.
The moral of the story: neither underestimate anybody’s capability
nor mock the bicycle brand. Lone wolves may bite hard.
Early birds
In summer or on foggy winter mornings, some ride without headlights and taillights, thus showing no regard for road safety and quality sleep.
Some groups start well before dawn, thereby destroying REM time. REM (rapid eye movement) time is the period of deep sleep
during which we dream. The eyes are closed but the eyeballs move in all directions as if glued to
a giant TV screen. Perhaps our souls travel to other parallel universes, or off-load
sensitive data to God’s supercomputer for analysis on Judgment Day, or receive
warnings and good news in coded form. Try losing one night’s REM sleep and see
how the day goes by.
A musical break here for REM's classic song: Everybody Hurts?
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Late Lateefs
Here is a scenario. The rendezvous is 5 a.m. The entire group is waiting for one undisciplined unpunctual
rider. He sends several text messages to the group-leader promising he is 'on my way', then finally joins the ride but offers no apology.
Aiming to be punctual is stressful and arriving early is utter waste of time. If you dislike discourteous time-wasters, it is best to ride alone.
Pied Piper on wheels
Once during a group ride, when dark clouds appeared, the group-leader insisted on continuing the ride. Soon there was heavy downpour and very strong gusts but the riders went on, trying hard not to slip or fall.
Later the leader admitted, "I love to ride in the rain!" Not everybody was amused.
Considering that water ingress caused rust in the bicycle components (especially the hubs and the bearings), I spent the next two days getting the hardened dirt off the bike.
When one rides alone, there is no silly urge to prove anything to anybody.
The road to progress
Until a few years, I routinely rode moderately fast. Then I switched to other methods of training to build better stamina and gain greater power.
Since most groups take unnatural pride in going fast, it is best to ride
alone and achieve important fitness goals at a pace that the mind and the body can handle.
Lean and mean
Although professional road cyclists consume plenty of carbohydrates and proteins, they tend to be skinny and have low body-fat due to high caloric expenditure.
By contrast, the average overweight amateur rider in a group dreams about losing weight just by
cycling. He rarely achieves the ideal body weight for his height, joins a gym for weight-training, consumes questionable food supplements, ends up increasing the body mass, and thinks that lighter carbon bikes will somehow reduce his own weight.
Thinking deeply about these matters is not possible when riding with groups. The best thoughts and plans come when one is alone.
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Sprints, anybody?
I hardly ever see local cyclists launching sprints. Everybody is
either going moderately fast or slower than normal. The following seven
reasons show why cyclists do not get their rear ends off the saddles:
- FRAME SIZE: Their bikes may not be the correct size for
their bodies.
- BIKE FIT: Their bikes may be poorly set up for comfort and
speed, thus encouraging wrong body angles which lead to aches in the arms, neck, back, knees, ankles
etc.
- FOOTWEAR: Their ordinary flat pedals prevent make from getting a decent foot-grip. They seldom use clipless cycling shoes for a locked-in grip; this prevents them from transferring greater power to the pedals. The solution for issues 1, 2 and 3 above is to pay for a professional bike-fit which perfectly matches the body to the bike.
- WEIGHT: They are overweight or obese. Sprints require flexibility,
agility, swiftness and power. Developing each quality takes time and consistent effort.
- KNOWLEDGE: They are unfamiliar with the correct technique
for sprinting.
- PRACTISE: They have not practised frequent power generation required for sprinting and which requires up
to four times more power than normal pedalling.
- FEAR: They imagine sprinting will increase the heart-rate so
much that it will explode. I recall riding with a doctor who
preferred staying below 135 BPM (beats per minute). He was fifty, overweight and afraid of stressing his heart.
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Many group riders are addicted to uploading their ride
statistics on Strava. The app was free until recently but is now a subscription
service.
On the Strava platform, grown men suffer from pedalling envy
because they imagine they will improve just by peeking at others’ ride
statistics.
Riders have been caught on the internet faking the
starting and the end points of their rides or showing fantastic power figures (FTP,
watts) by drafting behind passing vehicles.
One must have aims in life. All my rides are learning experiences through
training. It is helpful to assess routes, their vibration levels, slope
angles and traffic patterns. None of these fine activities are satisfactorily possible if one rides in a group.
Aunty social
So intensely focussed are some riders on the rear wheels of those ahead, they seldom acknowledge other riders on the road, leave aside wave at them.
I used to cordially wave at other riders but then quit the distracting habit because I found them looking through me.
Social roller coaster
Some fully grown riders regularly join so-called ‘social rides’ where they pedal with children on tricycles and hijabi
ladies sitting very low on creaky bikes.
Who wants to ride at 15 km/h when 30-35 km/h is the normal
speed for good riders? Who wants to be in a wolf-pack or a group of cackling crows
when soaring like an eagle or roaring like a lion is the thang to do?
Then there are them bachelors who ride just to blend
with the ladies at every sponsored group ride.
Feeling a bit under pressure, some married men too play this game.
Essentially, a social ride is the comedy version of a serious ride.
Road-deaf
Just because Bluetooth devices are available must not mean
one should cover the ears while riding. Earbuds belong on an indoors
trainer or in a gym. Incidentally, the word gymnasium comes from the Ancient Greek term gymnós, meaning 'naked or 'nude'. Only adult male citizens were allowed to use the gymnasia.
Not only is wearing large headphones in public a poor fashion
statement, it is outright dangerous because one is totally isolated from the
surroundings, and the sweat absorbed by the earpieces turns into deadly
germs to cause fungal infections—call that hearing AIDS.Instead of being all ears to the traffic, some riders
prefer listening to music or recitation of holy texts.
Forget riding with clowns and instead go solo to develop better road-sense and
peripheral vision.
Chatterboxes on saddles
What I enjoy most about solo rides is the pleasure of having
a quiet mind, devoid of jumbled thoughts, purely focussed on the ride. I call it
medi-cadence—a combination of yoga meditation and cadence (pedalling speed).
Talking while riding has its pitfalls:
- It robs one of energy
and distracts from the road.
- Even two bottles of energy drinks in the bottle cages may not be able to prevent drying
up of the throat due to excessive talking.
- Opening the mouth unnecessarily may allow insects to enter it.
Many who regularly use cell phone while riding find it impossible to ignore requests for position reports from
suspicious wives. I know several riders who have crashed into one
another or caused road accidents because of cell phone distraction.Bad company
Most riders in a group with easy-going natures, at least one will be a stick in the mud. I have known such people who show no
warmth and do not reciprocate good wishes. They are there to quietly watch or jealously
look at your accessories and the bike. Such people seldom smile and almost never
laugh. They are emotionally repressed, perhaps dangerous, and could do
mankind an immense favour by staying at home.
Again, the best
company on the road is your own company.
It is time to listen to another classic song from 1975 by Bad Company: Feel Like Makin’ Love.
Break-dance
Many groups that I have ridden with destroy good cycling pace by taking several short
breaks or slow down repeatedly to allow those lagging behind to catch up.
When one rides at a pace of two minutes per
kilometre, it translates to a speed of 30 km/hour. Not many group-leaders will maintain steady speeds unless they use cycling computers and possess leadership qualities. And not every rider uses a cycling computer which means he lacks interest in ogling at important statistics and progress.
Eating out (hogging)
Coupled with good dietary habits, cycling can indeed help
one lose weight. Take a look at professional cyclists who are mostly tanned
skeletons riding in pelotons and need much less body-fat during fast climbs over mountainous terrain.
Most riders I encounter are overweight by 10-25 kg. They
routinely stop at coffee shops to consume commercially prepared drinks
or full breakfasts and then report the hogging activity on Facebook.
Why people take photos
of food before having it is fit for analysis by a psychiatrist. The text of their posts and the faces wearing patent smiles remain boringly the same. Some in such groups are quick to shoot photos and video clips while riding. Who wants to be in a group that focuses too much on the 'fun' aspect?
Eating out destroys whatever health one builds up with
cycling. Instead of paying monthly food bills, I find it satisfying to buy better
apparel, accessories, spares or tools for bike maintenance.
Ta-ta
In essence, total cycling success requires:
- A focussed mind in a fit body.
- A decent bike with well-maintained hardware.
- Muscular strength.
- Correct techniques.
Remove any part from the above and the magic disappears.
I could say more on the subject of why cycling group rides remain unattractive to many riders but let me sign off by wishing you success in whichever way you chose to stay happier, healthier and sane.
Disclaimer:
If anybody that I know thinks that I have poked fun at his habits, then he should thank God for not being named here.
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