Whenever a new Pharaoh ascended the Egyptian throne, one of the first things he did as the Sun god was erase the names of previous Pharaohs off important stone structures and have his own engraved instead. Many Pharaohs fooled the Egyptians but none hoodwinked the gods.
That was Egypt; welcome to Karachi’s MQM era. Karachi Saddar’s TMA (Town Municipal Administration) recently decided to replace the names of the colonial era names of roads and streets located in the city with those of MQM workers killed in bomb blasts, target killings and shooting matches with rival political parties. Let there be no doubt that the MQM (Muttahida Qaumi Movement) is well-supplied with martyrs to the cause of speaking Urdu with great clarity.
Considering that Pakistani authorities always resort to naming everything in sight using just three names (Jinnah, Fatima and Liaqat), the MQM has shown that as a party it has more than three brain cells in its political head. Up north in the Punjab, Nawaz Sharif or his chief minister brother have not copied the MQM’s idea since none of their workers died for them or for their novel Muslim League (N). There exists the real danger of other political parties competing with the MQM to relocate their party headquarters to war-torn Karachiland, a move that could bring in scores of heaven-bound martyrs to their earthly causes.
Karachi’s Town Naib Nazim, Muhammad Nisar Khan Temuri, disclosed that the Saddar TMA has changed 400 names during the last four years. That is one change every three days, and at this speed, I am afraid the MQM’s bespectacled founder might inspire them through the telephone to change Karachi’s name to Altafabad. If they are not careful in the city, the name-change plague could also spread to other provinces of the Land of the almost-Pure.
The administration announced changing the names of eleven locations in Saddar alone, and very kindly, it issued a public notice asking the people to submit objections or suggestions within a fortnight, against or in favour of the new names.
The names of two parks, a cricket stadium, a roundabout and a road will now be named after Muhammad Khaleel Shaheed, a former MQM Nazim, who died in a blast outside the Jinnah Postgraduate Medical Centre emergency ward.
Although the notice refers to ‘the powers vested under Subsection 7 of Section 52 of the Sindh Local Government Ordinance, 1979’, former Karachi Nazim Niamatullah Khan opposed the name-change move and said ‘the MQM is making a fake claim since nobody can change the historical names of places, streets and roads.’
Temuri countered, “It is not a matter of powers vested under the ordinance; we issued the public notice as a formality, otherwise we can simply change the name without asking anyone. Whoever came into power in the past did the same thing, and if our administration has done it, it’s not a major problem. Nobody questioned the Pakistan Peoples’ Party (PPP) when they changed the name of Kharkar Chowrangi to Bilawal Chorangi. What has Bilawal done, except that he is the son of President Asif Ali Zardari? So what is the problem if we change the names of places and roads too?”
Leave the MQM’s cause alone for a while and focus on the clever Bilawal factor. May I too ask Bilawal’s father and Pakistan’s President, Asif Ali Zardari, what has his son done for Pakistan? Or more appropriately, what will he be capable of doing once he grows up—considering he has inherited from his father the tradition of serving the Fatherland in ways unknown to the entire nation?
Sadly, Temuri also justified MQM’s name-change plan by claiming that ‘most of the sites are from the pre-Partition era and were named after Hindu leaders of that time.’
Who is this Chatumal? Does anybody know him now and is it better to replace such names with the names of dead political party workers? As it turns out, the Chatumal Road in Garden was named after the famous philanthropist and politician of the city, Sobhraj Chatumal, who built a maternity hospital and several other welfare organisations in the late 1920s.
Elder residents of the area in question defended by insisting that ‘the compound, comprising of twelve houses, is over a century old and it was built by two brothers Chela Ram and Chhela Ram. One built the residential compound, while the other built the Usmanabad compound. The name shouldn’t be changed.’
Let us see now. Muhammad Khaleel Shaheed’s name will replace the names of Street 6 Park, UC-11, Block 2, Clifton; Cricket Stadium UC10, Block 5, Clifton; Gulshan-e-Faisal Roundabout, Block 7, UC-10, Bath Island; Albert Road, UC-9, Clifton and Bukhari Park, Block 7, UC-10, Clifton. In addition, Preet Road in Garden will be rename Arif Shabeer Road; Chatumal Road in Garden to Imran Hussain Shaheed Road; Hard Davis Road in Garden to Yaseen Chipa Shaheed Road, Chela Ram Compound in Garden to Musheeruddin Shaheed Street, Sotara Street in UC-5 in Nanak Wara to Haji Zafar Shaheed Street and a service road in Clifton Block 8 to AW Adamjee Road.
In the past, many sites were given new names but the citizens did not adapt to the changes and continued using the old names such as Geedar Colony in Landhi Town (now renamed Muzzafarabad Colony) and I.I. Chundrigar Road (previously McLeod Road).
What the MQM leadership does not realize is that the pre-partition non-Muslims did things for humanity, and not just for those who belonged to their caste or a clan that spoke a certain language. MQM is a personality cult meant for Urdu speakers and as such, their attempt at using their dead for the renaming campaign insults those who did greater things for the good of the common man. Justifiably, the residents of Chela Ram Compound located in Garden area said they ‘would not accept this move’.
In order to jump into a new bottle, the MQM itself changed its wine’s name from the original Muhajir Qaumi Movement to the politically appealing Mutahidda Qaumi Movement. They have at last realized that not everyone here is an Urdu-speaking immigrant who crossed over from India in 1947 when the colonialists divided the land and its people.
If we must change names, efforts must be made to reveal the pre-British Raj names so that we may step back in time without the aid of a fictional time-tunnel. We are a resilient nation and are now ready to withstand the shock of seeing everything in sight named after one Arab conqueror: Muhammad bin Qasim.
Photography - Music - Cycling - Memoirs - Investigations - Satire - History - Satire - Lunar Astronomy (since 2009)
Saturday, 19 June 2010
MQM Renames Places And Animals
Sunday, 6 June 2010
Five-Star Prison
Norway is a nice place where nothing worth remembering ever happens. I have been to Oslo many times; the taxis there are very expensive and men from my own country run the entire system of public transportation. One a recent trip, one such man occupying the driver’s seat spoke with me.
“I’ve been here for thirty years now. With God’s grace, it’s been a peaceful stay and I can’t remember anything nasty ever happening here. Anyway, so what’s happening in Pakistan these days?”
“Oh, the usual protests over blasphemous cartoons, burning of American and Israeli flags in major cities and a few suicidal attacks by foreign guests who appeared wearing explosive dinner jackets”, I updated him.
He slowed down a bit as if suffering from sensory overload, analyzing while twisting his moustaches nervously, not in a mood to hear any more breaking news that broke his tender heart at age sixty.
“So, what’s with this Norwegian luxury prison?” I broke the silence.
“Norwegian prison bosses are ready to inaugurate the world’s most luxurious jail. It will have a host of facilities such as flat screen TVs, a recording studio for bathroom singers, and Banksy style murals. The £160 million prison, near Oslo, Norway, will allow 252 inmates a single en suite cell with its own bathroom and windows without bars inside the ‘maximum security’ compound. The authorities here have spent more than £1 million on modern art, and even provided prisoners with climbing walls,” he elaborated.
That was a buffet for thought. By contrast, our rulers, who have successfully turned the entire Islamic republic into an American prison, complete with barbed wires, dangerous road obstructions, security checks and what have you, will never understand this luxury prison concept.
The security agencies here claim repeatedly, “This is for your own safety”.
But how much is safe enough? When will that day dawn when the world will be free of those giant green bugs from planet Mars whose sole mission in life is to destroy the America way of life?
I thought of the forever-smiling man in-charge of my country who, while languishing in Karachi’s jail, never enjoyed what Norwegian criminals will soon be able to. But that is Europe; this is Pakistan. There men of honour resign at the slightest hint of misdemeanour or misappropriation; here they do not know what the word resign means.
Now, if the Europeans treat their criminals so humanely, imagine what they will do next to law-abiding citizens.
“I’ve been here for thirty years now. With God’s grace, it’s been a peaceful stay and I can’t remember anything nasty ever happening here. Anyway, so what’s happening in Pakistan these days?”
“Oh, the usual protests over blasphemous cartoons, burning of American and Israeli flags in major cities and a few suicidal attacks by foreign guests who appeared wearing explosive dinner jackets”, I updated him.
He slowed down a bit as if suffering from sensory overload, analyzing while twisting his moustaches nervously, not in a mood to hear any more breaking news that broke his tender heart at age sixty.
“So, what’s with this Norwegian luxury prison?” I broke the silence.
“Norwegian prison bosses are ready to inaugurate the world’s most luxurious jail. It will have a host of facilities such as flat screen TVs, a recording studio for bathroom singers, and Banksy style murals. The £160 million prison, near Oslo, Norway, will allow 252 inmates a single en suite cell with its own bathroom and windows without bars inside the ‘maximum security’ compound. The authorities here have spent more than £1 million on modern art, and even provided prisoners with climbing walls,” he elaborated.
That was a buffet for thought. By contrast, our rulers, who have successfully turned the entire Islamic republic into an American prison, complete with barbed wires, dangerous road obstructions, security checks and what have you, will never understand this luxury prison concept.
The security agencies here claim repeatedly, “This is for your own safety”.
But how much is safe enough? When will that day dawn when the world will be free of those giant green bugs from planet Mars whose sole mission in life is to destroy the America way of life?
I thought of the forever-smiling man in-charge of my country who, while languishing in Karachi’s jail, never enjoyed what Norwegian criminals will soon be able to. But that is Europe; this is Pakistan. There men of honour resign at the slightest hint of misdemeanour or misappropriation; here they do not know what the word resign means.
Now, if the Europeans treat their criminals so humanely, imagine what they will do next to law-abiding citizens.
Saturday, 29 May 2010
Sitting All Day
Abusing someone vocally or in writing is almost as bad as killing someone physically. If the abusers on Chowq were given a chance, they would love to kill those who justifiably oppose their poisoned tongues and pens. The shameless management (unapologetic to the core) of Chowq and its group of 'poor minorities' need to stop using this yubb-site to make Islam look bad.
In condemning state-sponsored terror, I condemn entire governments (both Muslim and Western) and their overt and covert organizations for spreading evil.
And I side with the good, although evil has so much appeal. To expect me to sit all day and condemn this or that means that I must behave like the corrupt politicians who do the same. They dish out money (loans from IMF-WB) to the victims. Is that the solution? No, that is 'shut up-WE-did-it-to-you' blood-money!
I did enquire from several friends (from the minority group) whose members were killed yesterday. May the killers and the killed be judged by God.
The rot is too deep as a dozen agencies out here are serving mankind this poisonous drink of terrorism and security. It is like a bowl of spaghetti, with each end tied to another one. The people are weak as they do not have the police or the Army to defend them. The rulers have mastered the art of using all means to crush those they rule. But there is hope; there always must be.
Global organizations have not stopped wars but only promoted colonial agendas and perpetuated greater evil. Peace is an illusion, a Hollywood dream that people think is within their grasp.
Why must someone's bad stomach in Washington ruin my life in the East? But that is the way it is designed, with the 'right' technology to make our lives more miserable. Whatever evil took years to accomplish can now take only a few seconds to achieve.
May the destroyers of good be wiped off the face of the Earth by the Hand of God. The evil is too great to be handled alone.
Peace.
In condemning state-sponsored terror, I condemn entire governments (both Muslim and Western) and their overt and covert organizations for spreading evil.
And I side with the good, although evil has so much appeal. To expect me to sit all day and condemn this or that means that I must behave like the corrupt politicians who do the same. They dish out money (loans from IMF-WB) to the victims. Is that the solution? No, that is 'shut up-WE-did-it-to-you' blood-money!
I did enquire from several friends (from the minority group) whose members were killed yesterday. May the killers and the killed be judged by God.
The rot is too deep as a dozen agencies out here are serving mankind this poisonous drink of terrorism and security. It is like a bowl of spaghetti, with each end tied to another one. The people are weak as they do not have the police or the Army to defend them. The rulers have mastered the art of using all means to crush those they rule. But there is hope; there always must be.
Global organizations have not stopped wars but only promoted colonial agendas and perpetuated greater evil. Peace is an illusion, a Hollywood dream that people think is within their grasp.
Why must someone's bad stomach in Washington ruin my life in the East? But that is the way it is designed, with the 'right' technology to make our lives more miserable. Whatever evil took years to accomplish can now take only a few seconds to achieve.
May the destroyers of good be wiped off the face of the Earth by the Hand of God. The evil is too great to be handled alone.
Peace.
Thursday, 27 May 2010
Chowk: This Site is Restricted
And moreover, Dr Safwan Shah and Chowq ed-eaters, do read all my old blogs on Chowq that uncover your yubb-site's highhandedness, insults hurled at Muslims (through your minions) and unfair bans unleashed on those who justifiably protested. But your cyberspace Guantanamo will fail and your water-boarding will always remain distasteful.
Dr Shah, show me just one blog or interact where I abused others' gods and I will show you a million places where your e-tribe wilfully hurt the feelings of those who worship God and bow down before Him alone. You may have given up your faith living in the kingdom of the crystal skull but we haven't in the land of the pure.
As for the rest of the silent readers who felt hurt, and the mild protestors who felt deep down they were with me but somehow abandoned me because it was declared fashionable by a few rebellious Chowq devils, I congratulate all of you. The PTA (Pakistan Telecommunication Authority), that small ant has struck back with a ‘This Site is Restricted’ move.
Dr Shah, Chowq is your mad elephant and you have always acted like Abraha all along, and may God's own little birds level your unblessed e-commerce. Truly, Chowq deserves a complete ban in Pakistan, and owes all the Muslims an unconditional apology for having done tremendous wrong for years on end.
If you find that my original blog has been removed from Chowq, you are at the right space reading it: here!
And home is where I hang my hat and lay down my bullwhip. If you do not mind, I am tired now and need some rest.
Dr Shah, show me just one blog or interact where I abused others' gods and I will show you a million places where your e-tribe wilfully hurt the feelings of those who worship God and bow down before Him alone. You may have given up your faith living in the kingdom of the crystal skull but we haven't in the land of the pure.
As for the rest of the silent readers who felt hurt, and the mild protestors who felt deep down they were with me but somehow abandoned me because it was declared fashionable by a few rebellious Chowq devils, I congratulate all of you. The PTA (Pakistan Telecommunication Authority), that small ant has struck back with a ‘This Site is Restricted’ move.
Dr Shah, Chowq is your mad elephant and you have always acted like Abraha all along, and may God's own little birds level your unblessed e-commerce. Truly, Chowq deserves a complete ban in Pakistan, and owes all the Muslims an unconditional apology for having done tremendous wrong for years on end.
If you find that my original blog has been removed from Chowq, you are at the right space reading it: here!
And home is where I hang my hat and lay down my bullwhip. If you do not mind, I am tired now and need some rest.
Chowk Insults The Prophet
PTA has established a Crisis Cell to monitor all such contents. PTA’s helpline toll free number 0800-55055 and email complaint@pta.gov.pk can be used to notify all similar URLs where such objectionable material is placed.
Khurram A. Mehran, Director (PR)
***
Here is an example of Chowk's freedom of foul speech and zero tolerance for good sense. I request all sensible people to call or email the PTA regarding the anti-Islam filth posted at www.chowk.com
The following is the latest insult ot all Muslims, despite my repeated requests and warnings to Chowk staff:
***
http://www.chowk.com/interacts/17327#455697
#28 Posted by PedoProphet02 on May 23, 2010 9:29:28 am
"Slave-Hussaini, I had a vision about Prophet last night - An Arab looking man in the town of Macca, hair full of lice with a sword in his right hand and an erect penus oozing scum in the left hand; dead men/boys on the ground; him tilling girls and women while offering peace (Salam) to people with an option either to choose sword or penis for the purpose. A bunch of slave girls/womem and boys behind his soldiers being dragged like camels. Do you think it was a good dream or bad?"
Khurram A. Mehran, Director (PR)
***
Here is an example of Chowk's freedom of foul speech and zero tolerance for good sense. I request all sensible people to call or email the PTA regarding the anti-Islam filth posted at www.chowk.com
The following is the latest insult ot all Muslims, despite my repeated requests and warnings to Chowk staff:
***
http://www.chowk.com/interacts/17327#455697
#28 Posted by PedoProphet02 on May 23, 2010 9:29:28 am
"Slave-Hussaini, I had a vision about Prophet last night - An Arab looking man in the town of Macca, hair full of lice with a sword in his right hand and an erect penus oozing scum in the left hand; dead men/boys on the ground; him tilling girls and women while offering peace (Salam) to people with an option either to choose sword or penis for the purpose. A bunch of slave girls/womem and boys behind his soldiers being dragged like camels. Do you think it was a good dream or bad?"
Friday, 21 May 2010
Cyber Bans
Cyber terrorism originating from the US and Europe must stop. I recall having McAfee Anti-Virus on my computer and watching with horror, a world map of the sources of such malicious attacks; they came from the so-called centres of the 'New World' and the 'civilized advanced nations' in our direction. Is there a law in place to protect us from these monsters?
Many talk-show hosts, stand-up comedians and their fans love insulting God, His books and the prophets he sent for our guidance. Non-sense must be stopped; freedom of speech does not mean THIS!
It is appalling how those who earlier felt quite amused by the abuse hurled at what is dear to Muslims are now bemoaning the recent FaceBook debacle.
Shameless indeed are those who do not hold owners of such websites responsible for the filth they allow to be published against Muslims. The Pakistan Telecommunication Authority (PTA) knows it all too and has asked the ISPs to block many offensive websites, and perhaps soon the High Court will 'do more' for our saviours in Washing-ton.
Please read '440 Volts Jolt' in the sidebar; my profile says it all. We need to openly condemn all turncoats, collaborators and traitors amongst us and elsewhere whose mission in life is to create unrest leading to wars. The world will not come to an end if there is no FaceBook, Wikipedia, Twitter or YouTube.
Each Muslim who prays sends out an SMS to every other Muslim. Let us see how satanic technology can block this!
NEWS JUST IN:
WASHINGTON: An American cartoonist whose work inspired the controversial “Everybody Draw Muhammed Page” on Facebook has condemned the effort and issued an apology to Muslims. Molly Norris, of Seattle, drew a cartoon in April to protest the decision by the US television channel Comedy Central to cancel an episode of the popular show “South Park” over its depiction of the Prophet Muhammed (PBUH).
In her cartoon, Norris satirically proposed May 20 as an “Everybody Draw Muhammed Day”.
“I apologise to Muslims and ask that this ‘day’ be called off,” the American cartoonist said.
Many talk-show hosts, stand-up comedians and their fans love insulting God, His books and the prophets he sent for our guidance. Non-sense must be stopped; freedom of speech does not mean THIS!
It is appalling how those who earlier felt quite amused by the abuse hurled at what is dear to Muslims are now bemoaning the recent FaceBook debacle.
Shameless indeed are those who do not hold owners of such websites responsible for the filth they allow to be published against Muslims. The Pakistan Telecommunication Authority (PTA) knows it all too and has asked the ISPs to block many offensive websites, and perhaps soon the High Court will 'do more' for our saviours in Washing-ton.
Please read '440 Volts Jolt' in the sidebar; my profile says it all. We need to openly condemn all turncoats, collaborators and traitors amongst us and elsewhere whose mission in life is to create unrest leading to wars. The world will not come to an end if there is no FaceBook, Wikipedia, Twitter or YouTube.
Each Muslim who prays sends out an SMS to every other Muslim. Let us see how satanic technology can block this!
NEWS JUST IN:
WASHINGTON: An American cartoonist whose work inspired the controversial “Everybody Draw Muhammed Page” on Facebook has condemned the effort and issued an apology to Muslims. Molly Norris, of Seattle, drew a cartoon in April to protest the decision by the US television channel Comedy Central to cancel an episode of the popular show “South Park” over its depiction of the Prophet Muhammed (PBUH).
In her cartoon, Norris satirically proposed May 20 as an “Everybody Draw Muhammed Day”.
“I apologise to Muslims and ask that this ‘day’ be called off,” the American cartoonist said.
Sunday, 16 May 2010
Bollywood Song Parodies By Tahir Gul Hasan
Dear music lovers:
It all started with great innocence and soon developed into something very lethal.
First the Press Trust Of India noticed what I was doing to their Bollywood songs. Then came along India's CATCH NEWS e-zine which covered my parodies with an article titled: New twist to old Bollywood songs, courtesy an ardent Pakistani fan. On both occasions, it was journalist Lamat R Hasan who spread the good news.
So here it is, all of the songs in one blog along with their web links.
Enjoy!
***
28) What Shall I Preach To You, Doll Rubber?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2010/12/what-shall-i-preach-to-you-doll-rubber.html
27) Ranch, Love-Gum, Woes
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2010/03/ranch-love-gum-woes.html
26) From Behind Your (Fake) Eyelashes
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/12/from-behind-your-fake-eyelashes.html
25) Shall I Kill Thee Or What?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/12/shall-i-kill-thee-or-what.html
24) O Hidden One (Under My Bed), Appear Before Me!
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/11/o-hidden-one-under-my-bed-appear-before.html
23) I Earn Abundantly But The Earnings Go Under
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/i-earn-abundantly-but-earnings-go-under.html
22) Eena, Meena, Deeka
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/eena-meena-deeka.html
21) This Is Not A ChooRhi (Sweeperess)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/this-is-not-choorhisweeperess.html
20) Can't You Hug Her?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/cant-you-hug-her.html
19) The Job Of The Broken Porcelain) Dil(do)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/job-of-broken-porcelain-dildo.html
18) Come Here To My Hot Zoo
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/come-here-to-my-hot-zoo.html
17) The Poppy Scorpion's Singer Mounted Me!
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/poppy-scorpions-singer-mounted-me.html
16) I Swear Upon The Shame(ful) Gum
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/i-swear-upon-shameful-gum.html
15) I'm Paula Abdul's Lyricist
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/im-paula-abduls-lyricst.html
14) From Your (Moulin Rouge) World
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/from-your-moulin-rouge-world.html
13) That Love-Gum Of Yours Was Just An X-cuse
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/that-love-gum-of-yours-was-just-x-cuse.html
12) It Doesn't Matter If You Don't Play (Doc-Doc) With Me
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/it-doesnt-matter-if-you-dont-play-doc.html
11) (Hey Babe) The French Letters That I Wrote To You
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/hey-babe-french-letters-that-i-wrote-to.html
10) My Foe, May You Thirst For My (Pen-prick)Friendship
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/my-foe-may-you-thirst-for-my-pen.html
9) Is That Not Him?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/is-that-not-him.html
8) Feeling Helpless, She May Have Chosen To Forget Me
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/feeling-helpless-she-may-have-chosen-to.html
7) That Thing Which Is In You (Ooh...Babe)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/that-thing-which-is-in-you-oohbabe.html
6) What Have You Promised Me (O Mother Of 13 Royal Ones)?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/what-youve-promised-me-o-mother-of-13.html
5) Let The Flowers Touch Your Feet (Baby, Baby, Baby!)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/let-flowers-touch-your-feet-baby-baby.html
4) My Eyes Became Tearful As I Thought Of You (Baby, Baby...)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/my-eyes-became-tearful-as-i-thought-of.html
3) Let Both Of Us Become Strangers Once Again
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/let-both-of-us-become-strangers-once.html
2) What Came To Your Mind, O Creator Of The World?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/what-came-to-your-mind-o-creator-of.html
1) If I'm Separated From You
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/if-im-separated-from-you.html
It all started with great innocence and soon developed into something very lethal.
First the Press Trust Of India noticed what I was doing to their Bollywood songs. Then came along India's CATCH NEWS e-zine which covered my parodies with an article titled: New twist to old Bollywood songs, courtesy an ardent Pakistani fan. On both occasions, it was journalist Lamat R Hasan who spread the good news.
So here it is, all of the songs in one blog along with their web links.
Enjoy!
***
28) What Shall I Preach To You, Doll Rubber?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2010/12/what-shall-i-preach-to-you-doll-rubber.html
27) Ranch, Love-Gum, Woes
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2010/03/ranch-love-gum-woes.html
26) From Behind Your (Fake) Eyelashes
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/12/from-behind-your-fake-eyelashes.html
25) Shall I Kill Thee Or What?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/12/shall-i-kill-thee-or-what.html
24) O Hidden One (Under My Bed), Appear Before Me!
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/11/o-hidden-one-under-my-bed-appear-before.html
23) I Earn Abundantly But The Earnings Go Under
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/i-earn-abundantly-but-earnings-go-under.html
22) Eena, Meena, Deeka
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/eena-meena-deeka.html
21) This Is Not A ChooRhi (Sweeperess)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/this-is-not-choorhisweeperess.html
20) Can't You Hug Her?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/cant-you-hug-her.html
19) The Job Of The Broken Porcelain) Dil(do)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/job-of-broken-porcelain-dildo.html
18) Come Here To My Hot Zoo
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/come-here-to-my-hot-zoo.html
17) The Poppy Scorpion's Singer Mounted Me!
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/poppy-scorpions-singer-mounted-me.html
16) I Swear Upon The Shame(ful) Gum
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/i-swear-upon-shameful-gum.html
15) I'm Paula Abdul's Lyricist
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/im-paula-abduls-lyricst.html
14) From Your (Moulin Rouge) World
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/from-your-moulin-rouge-world.html
13) That Love-Gum Of Yours Was Just An X-cuse
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/that-love-gum-of-yours-was-just-x-cuse.html
12) It Doesn't Matter If You Don't Play (Doc-Doc) With Me
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/it-doesnt-matter-if-you-dont-play-doc.html
11) (Hey Babe) The French Letters That I Wrote To You
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/hey-babe-french-letters-that-i-wrote-to.html
10) My Foe, May You Thirst For My (Pen-prick)Friendship
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/my-foe-may-you-thirst-for-my-pen.html
9) Is That Not Him?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/is-that-not-him.html
8) Feeling Helpless, She May Have Chosen To Forget Me
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/feeling-helpless-she-may-have-chosen-to.html
7) That Thing Which Is In You (Ooh...Babe)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/that-thing-which-is-in-you-oohbabe.html
6) What Have You Promised Me (O Mother Of 13 Royal Ones)?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/what-youve-promised-me-o-mother-of-13.html
5) Let The Flowers Touch Your Feet (Baby, Baby, Baby!)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/let-flowers-touch-your-feet-baby-baby.html
4) My Eyes Became Tearful As I Thought Of You (Baby, Baby...)
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/my-eyes-became-tearful-as-i-thought-of.html
3) Let Both Of Us Become Strangers Once Again
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/let-both-of-us-become-strangers-once.html
2) What Came To Your Mind, O Creator Of The World?
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/what-came-to-your-mind-o-creator-of.html
1) If I'm Separated From You
http://writersblocktgh.blogspot.com/2009/10/if-im-separated-from-you.html
Saturday, 8 May 2010
Being Economically Dressed In Ukraine
The West always oppresses and taunts Muslim women for covering their faces and sometimes, entire bodies. They obviously never look at modestly dressed Christian nuns; such are the snide moves that the secularists make—not that I advocate that awful full-body battle apparel called ‘Burqa’.
Our women can and do protest but mostly in their feminine hearts. By contrast, the liberated Western women expose themselves to their admirers to sometimes launch completely or partially nude protests in full view of the public. Let us not call their condition ‘nude’ but rather one where they are very economically clad—thanks to this itch to unclothe due to global warming. Their unhappy exposure appears to have some link with the climate change that we are told is taking place all around Al Gore and his pseudo science thugs.
Ukraine is a great country—it is unfortunate that comedian Borat only spanks Kazakistan in his comedy shows (watch his movie: ‘Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan’). So what wrong did Ukraine do? They did this. Four young women—very economically dressed from the waist up—forcefully moved into a Ukrainian polling station to hold an unruly protest just before a candidate in the country’s presidential election cast his ballot there. One can imagine the effect that might have had on the poor male voters lined up to—of all the things—push a piece of paper into a barren ballot box.
Photographers are lucky people by a poor deprived person’s standards. An AFP photographer saw the women, members of a small feminist group called ‘Femen’ known for staging eye-catching protests, being hustled out of the Kiev polling station by security guards (let us call them ‘Naked Fight Coordinators’) before candidate Viktor Yanukovich showed up to vote. And poor Viktor Yanukovich missed the entire flesh exposure. I think he might have rejoiced in the fact that it does not matter who castes the votes, what matters is who counts them.
“Enough raping our democracy!” shouted the protesters, who held signs with slogans such as ‘Help! Rape!’ and wore nothing except for jeans and strips of green electrical tape.
Whether pasting green electrical tape on one’s chest or being a Greenpeace activist, anything green is considered good these days—now that the politicians have run out of promises.
When Ukrainian women are so open about politics, one need not worry about the silent men. The women told reporters they were protesting ‘the end of democracy’ in Ukraine and not specifically against Yanukovich or in favour of his rival, Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko. We are not told what the men said about the demise of democracy.
Femen, whose members are mostly university students, attracted international attention last summer when it held a protest against Ukraine’s sex tourism trade where activists picketed in central Kiev wearing bras and panties.
If taking one’s clothes off as part of public protest is what they call true democracy and freedom of speech, Pakistan’s debauched elites would love to listen to overt American suggestions while ignoring the calls of all bearded and veiled tyrants.
Bras and panties cover, they hold things together nicely. The reason why Russia broke up into many small countries is that they ran out of red bras and panties that previously held together the Communist political system of the same colour.
Our women can and do protest but mostly in their feminine hearts. By contrast, the liberated Western women expose themselves to their admirers to sometimes launch completely or partially nude protests in full view of the public. Let us not call their condition ‘nude’ but rather one where they are very economically clad—thanks to this itch to unclothe due to global warming. Their unhappy exposure appears to have some link with the climate change that we are told is taking place all around Al Gore and his pseudo science thugs.
Ukraine is a great country—it is unfortunate that comedian Borat only spanks Kazakistan in his comedy shows (watch his movie: ‘Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan’). So what wrong did Ukraine do? They did this. Four young women—very economically dressed from the waist up—forcefully moved into a Ukrainian polling station to hold an unruly protest just before a candidate in the country’s presidential election cast his ballot there. One can imagine the effect that might have had on the poor male voters lined up to—of all the things—push a piece of paper into a barren ballot box.
Photographers are lucky people by a poor deprived person’s standards. An AFP photographer saw the women, members of a small feminist group called ‘Femen’ known for staging eye-catching protests, being hustled out of the Kiev polling station by security guards (let us call them ‘Naked Fight Coordinators’) before candidate Viktor Yanukovich showed up to vote. And poor Viktor Yanukovich missed the entire flesh exposure. I think he might have rejoiced in the fact that it does not matter who castes the votes, what matters is who counts them.
“Enough raping our democracy!” shouted the protesters, who held signs with slogans such as ‘Help! Rape!’ and wore nothing except for jeans and strips of green electrical tape.
Whether pasting green electrical tape on one’s chest or being a Greenpeace activist, anything green is considered good these days—now that the politicians have run out of promises.
When Ukrainian women are so open about politics, one need not worry about the silent men. The women told reporters they were protesting ‘the end of democracy’ in Ukraine and not specifically against Yanukovich or in favour of his rival, Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko. We are not told what the men said about the demise of democracy.
Femen, whose members are mostly university students, attracted international attention last summer when it held a protest against Ukraine’s sex tourism trade where activists picketed in central Kiev wearing bras and panties.
If taking one’s clothes off as part of public protest is what they call true democracy and freedom of speech, Pakistan’s debauched elites would love to listen to overt American suggestions while ignoring the calls of all bearded and veiled tyrants.
Bras and panties cover, they hold things together nicely. The reason why Russia broke up into many small countries is that they ran out of red bras and panties that previously held together the Communist political system of the same colour.
Saturday, 1 May 2010
Bill Turns To Stone
Last winter thousands of ethnic Albanians braved low temperatures and a cold wind in Pristina, Kosovo’s capital, to welcome former US president Bill Clinton as he attended the unveiling of an 11-foot statue of himself on a key boulevard that also bears his name.
Clinton is celebrated as a hero by Kosovo’s ethnic Albanian majority for launching NATO’s bombing campaign against Yugoslavia in 1999 that stopped the brutal Serb forces’ crackdown on independence-seeking ethnic Albanians. This is Clinton’s first visit to Kosovo since it declared independence from Serbia last year.
Many waved American, Albanian and Kosovo flags and chanted “USA!” as the former president climbed on top of a podium with his poster in the background that read ‘Kosovo honours a hero’. The statue stood on top of a white-tiled base in the tiny square surrounded by communist-era buildings.
Nations raise statues of great men who are sometimes later blamed for the destruction and plunder of the same lands; the disgusted people then happily spit or beat with shoes the images of the heroes of their past. In recent history, we have witnessed such delightful spectacles in Russia and Iraq.
To name boulevards after sinful Bill is one thing but to erect statues in his tarnished name is paying undeserved homage to Oval Office erections. There was one flaw with the piece of public art: White House intern Monica Lewinsky’s marble lips were not shown attached to a readily excitable part of old Bill’s anatomy.
Even if the sculptures were to be condemned as un-Islamic in Pakistan, we need statues of our semi literate semi great men in public squares because the public needs to vent out its anger on powerless stone demigods.
Clinton is celebrated as a hero by Kosovo’s ethnic Albanian majority for launching NATO’s bombing campaign against Yugoslavia in 1999 that stopped the brutal Serb forces’ crackdown on independence-seeking ethnic Albanians. This is Clinton’s first visit to Kosovo since it declared independence from Serbia last year.
Many waved American, Albanian and Kosovo flags and chanted “USA!” as the former president climbed on top of a podium with his poster in the background that read ‘Kosovo honours a hero’. The statue stood on top of a white-tiled base in the tiny square surrounded by communist-era buildings.
Nations raise statues of great men who are sometimes later blamed for the destruction and plunder of the same lands; the disgusted people then happily spit or beat with shoes the images of the heroes of their past. In recent history, we have witnessed such delightful spectacles in Russia and Iraq.
To name boulevards after sinful Bill is one thing but to erect statues in his tarnished name is paying undeserved homage to Oval Office erections. There was one flaw with the piece of public art: White House intern Monica Lewinsky’s marble lips were not shown attached to a readily excitable part of old Bill’s anatomy.
Even if the sculptures were to be condemned as un-Islamic in Pakistan, we need statues of our semi literate semi great men in public squares because the public needs to vent out its anger on powerless stone demigods.
Sunday, 25 April 2010
TGH Photography Exhibition (DAWN article)
A Professional’s Touch
By Mahnaz Hasan
Capturing the world through the lens is all in a day’s work for a seriously hardworking Lahore amateur
Images have their own language. While the artist, transforms even the mundane into a work of art, the photographer uses images to communicate volumes to you — in a sweeping glance. As was the case during a recent exhibition at the Alliance Francaise, Lahore. Titled, One for the Road it was photographer Tahir Gul Hasan’s first solo exhibition.
Hasan, a self-starter in photography about thirty-five years ago, has refuse to embrace the discipline as a profession. He likes the freedom of being an amateur (Latin for “lover”), who can indulge in his other passions — music, writing and travel. He did, however, study the F/64 giants, the Magnum greats and the Surrealists, but drew his own conclusions and came up with his own perspective. One for the Road was the collection of street photography, which attracts him more than any thing else.
“I am only interested in capturing fragments of the ‘Inner Reality’ when they unfold before me,” explains Hasan. He prefers older equipment to the digital because he believes that “a dose of pain always yields creative gain” — which lends him a margin of creativity with a medium that has inherent limitations.
Tahir Gul Hasan’s exhibition (comprising forty-one exhibits) was a keen observation of the human condition, which he has converted into a story to be told. He appeared to pick out the human element in the spectacular and the sophisticated and present it against a pitch black background that not only lends a strong contrast to the image, but also boldly states his message, be it in the inherent abstraction and purity of black and white photography or in a playful splash of colour depicting interesting subjects.
While the Autumn in Paris, Shadow and its Butterfly and River Gilgit are brilliant examples of nature in its pure glory, the Eiffel Tower Toilettes, Old city/New city and The Wooden Bridge presented the mundane against the sophistication of modern day life.
His abstracts and still-life presentations are simple but beautiful in black and white as well as in colour. Star and Stripes, PIA No: 1, Flower and its Soul and Mad Cow at Ease displayed simple subjects with a fresh perspective, which only an amateur is perhaps capable of.
Hasan’s street portraits were the most interesting. No Jacket Required, Hubble-bubble and Boy in Trouble, Woodcutter’s Children, Lord of the Rings and Parts for Sale are brilliant examples of his rendition of the realities of ordinary existence, where he appears to be smiling at what he has captured — with the eye of a kindred soul.
One for the Road does not overwhelm your senses, as it is an uncluttered but creatively expert presentation of familiar mundane reality that you don’t have to spend hours to understand. The collection at the exhibition, was his favourite bests from his work so far — let’s watch out for more!
Reference:
For more on this exhibition, please read 'Pictures In My Mind' by Tahir Gul Hasan
Friday, 16 April 2010
Cocaine-Filled 123 Condoms
Switzerland is such a peaceful little country that all the ill-gotten money and gold robbed by dictators and crooks lies in its numbered bank accounts, and they insist on providing full privacy and secrecy to their transactions. Since nothing criminal that is worth reporting ever happens in Switzerland, whenever something does happen, the press never fails to report it.
Recently, the border guards arrested a Nigerian drugs smuggler in Switzerland, with not one or two but 123 condoms stuffed with cocaine weighing 1.7 Kg in his stomach.
A spokesperson for the federal border guards said “the 123 condoms represented the equivalent of a 5.5 metre long string of sausages or 3.5 litres of milk in volume. It’s exceptional because the contents of just one of the condoms could have killed the carrier.”
Now obviously, the man was not dreaming of death when he agreed to do the dastardly deed but rather of life and money. He was among six people in a French-registered car who instead of stop when asked to, jumped a red light to speed past a border post near Geneva. They later received free medical care in the form of X-rays, which revealed that four of them were carrying a total of nearly three Kilograms of cocaine in their stomachs, in five centimetre condom packages coated with a waxy substance.
Two other similar cases were uncovered in Switzerland in the past four months in which nine people were arrested from France and Spain. Swiss border guards recovered all of the swallowed cocaine capsules after several days.
What is this world coming to? People are misusing condoms and using the device for a forbidden pleasure that ranks quite low on an average person’s must-do list: getting high on contraband drugs.
Recently, the border guards arrested a Nigerian drugs smuggler in Switzerland, with not one or two but 123 condoms stuffed with cocaine weighing 1.7 Kg in his stomach.
A spokesperson for the federal border guards said “the 123 condoms represented the equivalent of a 5.5 metre long string of sausages or 3.5 litres of milk in volume. It’s exceptional because the contents of just one of the condoms could have killed the carrier.”
Now obviously, the man was not dreaming of death when he agreed to do the dastardly deed but rather of life and money. He was among six people in a French-registered car who instead of stop when asked to, jumped a red light to speed past a border post near Geneva. They later received free medical care in the form of X-rays, which revealed that four of them were carrying a total of nearly three Kilograms of cocaine in their stomachs, in five centimetre condom packages coated with a waxy substance.
Two other similar cases were uncovered in Switzerland in the past four months in which nine people were arrested from France and Spain. Swiss border guards recovered all of the swallowed cocaine capsules after several days.
What is this world coming to? People are misusing condoms and using the device for a forbidden pleasure that ranks quite low on an average person’s must-do list: getting high on contraband drugs.
Thursday, 8 April 2010
Sorcerer, Off With Your Head!
I beg God’s pardon if the king of a certain land is going to feel offended reading what I have written here.
In two of my older articles (Segregate Or Die, Fe-Male Without A Male Guardian), I narrated the sorry tales of women who got into trouble with the law; today we shall see how consulting horoscopes (I call them whore-oscopes) and predicting the future can land one straight in jail and beyond.
I have always maintained—in line with what the Qur’an states clearly—that predictions based on the movements of heavenly bodies is both a pseudo-science and a satanic deception. Allow me now to narrate the story of a man who predicted everybody else’s future but was unable to predict his own downfall.
Ali Hussain Sibat, a Lebanese man charged with sorcery, has now been sentenced to death in a certain land where opposing segregation of the sexes and standing up to question the authorities is punishable with death.
‘Sibat is scheduled to be beheaded next Friday’, May El Khansa, Sibat’s attorney told CNN.
Sibat's family came to know about the upcoming execution through an indirect source who knew the case well. So far, the Ministry of Justice has not commented on the matter.
El Khansa has gone as far as appealing to Lebanon's prime minister, Saad Hariri, and president, Michel Suleiman, to have the execution stopped. Amnesty International, the human rights group, has called on that certain country’s king to pardon Sibat.
What exactly did Sibat do? He is the former host of a popular call-in television show that aired on a Beirut-based satellite channel ‘Sheherazade’ and in which he predicted the future and advised his audience on many matters. In May 2008, while he was visiting a certain country to perform Umra (Islamic religious pilgrimage similar to Hajj), the religious police apprehended and charged with sorcery.
Sibat faced the court in November 2009, and which handed him a death sentence. He appealed the verdict in the Court of Appeal because he thought the initial verdict was premature.
Sibat’s attorney told CNN that ‘appeals court then sent the case back to the original court for reconsideration, stipulating that all charges made against Sibat needed to be verified and that he should be given a chance to repent.’
On March 10, the judges upheld their initial death sentence.
‘The court refused the sentence of the appeals court; my client will appeal the verdict once more,’ said Sibat’s attorney.
Let us stop right here and ponder over some questions.
How did Sibat—while living in Lebanon—harm the society of that certain land through his starry predictions?
Did he offend the royalty (Islamic royalty, if you do not mind) by predicting their not so rosy future?
Does the Qur’an stipulate death for sorcerers and blasphemers?
Is it right to arrest and condemn a person performing the Umrah?
Umrah and Hajj allow one to repent; since Sibat had applied to God for forgiveness, is it fair to ask him to repent before that certain land’s court?
And finally, I beg God’s pardon if the king of that certain land is going to feel offended reading what I have written.
May God help the king.
In two of my older articles (Segregate Or Die, Fe-Male Without A Male Guardian), I narrated the sorry tales of women who got into trouble with the law; today we shall see how consulting horoscopes (I call them whore-oscopes) and predicting the future can land one straight in jail and beyond.
I have always maintained—in line with what the Qur’an states clearly—that predictions based on the movements of heavenly bodies is both a pseudo-science and a satanic deception. Allow me now to narrate the story of a man who predicted everybody else’s future but was unable to predict his own downfall.
Ali Hussain Sibat, a Lebanese man charged with sorcery, has now been sentenced to death in a certain land where opposing segregation of the sexes and standing up to question the authorities is punishable with death.
‘Sibat is scheduled to be beheaded next Friday’, May El Khansa, Sibat’s attorney told CNN.
Sibat's family came to know about the upcoming execution through an indirect source who knew the case well. So far, the Ministry of Justice has not commented on the matter.
El Khansa has gone as far as appealing to Lebanon's prime minister, Saad Hariri, and president, Michel Suleiman, to have the execution stopped. Amnesty International, the human rights group, has called on that certain country’s king to pardon Sibat.
What exactly did Sibat do? He is the former host of a popular call-in television show that aired on a Beirut-based satellite channel ‘Sheherazade’ and in which he predicted the future and advised his audience on many matters. In May 2008, while he was visiting a certain country to perform Umra (Islamic religious pilgrimage similar to Hajj), the religious police apprehended and charged with sorcery.
Sibat faced the court in November 2009, and which handed him a death sentence. He appealed the verdict in the Court of Appeal because he thought the initial verdict was premature.
Sibat’s attorney told CNN that ‘appeals court then sent the case back to the original court for reconsideration, stipulating that all charges made against Sibat needed to be verified and that he should be given a chance to repent.’
On March 10, the judges upheld their initial death sentence.
‘The court refused the sentence of the appeals court; my client will appeal the verdict once more,’ said Sibat’s attorney.
Let us stop right here and ponder over some questions.
How did Sibat—while living in Lebanon—harm the society of that certain land through his starry predictions?
Did he offend the royalty (Islamic royalty, if you do not mind) by predicting their not so rosy future?
Does the Qur’an stipulate death for sorcerers and blasphemers?
Is it right to arrest and condemn a person performing the Umrah?
Umrah and Hajj allow one to repent; since Sibat had applied to God for forgiveness, is it fair to ask him to repent before that certain land’s court?
And finally, I beg God’s pardon if the king of that certain land is going to feel offended reading what I have written.
May God help the king.
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