Malala Yousuf Zai: Genius Or Mouth-Piece (part-I)

After having re-invented the wheel and sliced white bread, the entire mainstream media is forcefully letting out a weak stream of the official discharge into the urinal of our national consciousness. There are no alternative views, no probing questions, only emotional appeals and instant water for our eyes. And everyone I know is tired of the advertised-to-death Malala case and questions the veracity of the entire story.

Remember the doctored pictures of Osama Bin Laden assassination? After all, Dr. Afridi was involved in peddling disease-laden Polio vaccines in Abbotabad. An American stealth chopper shown crashed in the imagined safe-house in Abbotabad, a building showing no signs of an armed struggle, and a side shot of a local Osama look-alike watching TV just as any ‘most wanted terrorist’ would at home; this was the best half-Muslim Obama’s entire state machinery could do for heroic ex-CIA Osama who was disposed of without any Muslim funeral rites in a sea whose name is yet to be invented.

Much like the killers of President John Fitzgerald Kennedy created the single magic-bullet theory, we saw how hastily officials attributed Prime Minister Benazir Bhutto’s death to the magic lever of her jeep. The cover-ups are always elaborate and devious. Now we have the same cast of characters—invading Americans, invaded defenders and degraded politicians—presenting one more soap opera on the national stage. This nation is tired of the drones manufactured by the ‘best friend’ of our ‘friend’ which antagonise the population of carefully selected mineral-rich strategically-important areas. Oil and minerals, what else has it been throughout history?

Anyone for BBC-created diaries?

Supress your emotions while you read the nuggets selected from the BBC Urdu Online diary of Malala Yousuf Zai disguised as Gul Makai. The pages from this diary reflect many emotions and also provide insights into events that only expert-level commentators are fit to comment upon.

Children these days hardly get time off studies and tuitions, none I know spend precious time penning thoughts in a real dairy because now the youth have Mark Zuckerberg’s invention, Facebook, which was much appreciated by the CIA. They voluntarily report everything to this thing every day and spend whatever free time is left ogling at the spying cell phones.

Did Malala really write what they claim she wrote or was it as fictitious as the Anne Frank diaries written by her father, Otto frank, after WW-II to sell to the world sympathy for Hitler’s holocaust victims who happened to be only Jews? Can we actually see the original Malala diaries written in Urdu or they too will be reverse-engineered, frequently changed and printed posthumously for all to weep over? In any case, her English translations are just too British, occasionally they sound as if another less talented translator was at work. One must admit, for a Pashtu-speaking child, her spoken Urdu is quite good.

What is truly surprising is how Malala discusses persons and politics, and analyses events which is a rare quality in most grownups, leave alone amongst girls of her age. Very young girls just do not talk this way unless they have been coached from a very young age using special training aids.

Two writes can make one wrong

Here are some revelations from her diary spread over six BBC web pages:

“I have come to Bunair to spend Muharram (a Muslim holiday) on vacation.”

The Yousaf Zai tribe is predominantly composed of Sunni Muslims. And Muharram is the first month of the Islamic calendar, not a single holiday. The 9th and the 10th of Muharram are two gazetted national holidays. Malala is unclear, while the parenthesis placed by the translator lack proper research. We hope they both do better than this next time.

“[The Taliban] blow up those schools which are used by the security forces as security posts”.
 
How does she know about ‘those schools’? Did someone show her a compiled list? Did she go on a guided tour of Swat?

“I have seen wherever the army is there is usually a Taleban member nearby, but where there is a Taleban member the army will always not go.”

Can a child this young recognise nearby Talibans? Did she alert the army personnel whenever she saw the Taliban loitering around?

Her friend claims, “It may be that the Taleban destroyed the schools in anger [at the killing of Maulana Shah Dauran’s uncle]. No one has made the Taleban suffer but when they are hurt they take it out on our schools.”

“The army is also responsible for the disruption in our education. They are sitting in their bunkers on top of the hills. They slaughter goats and eat with pleasure.”

Again, this is amazingly speculative commentary on important events.The army she blames wholeheartedly. How could she see what happened atop the hills unless she went sight-seeing with a connected uncle?

“One day toffees were thrown from the helicopters and this continued for some time. Now whenever we hear the choppers flying we run out and wait for the toffees but it does not happen anymore.”

Recall that the Americans dropped bombs disguised as toys in Afghanistan and which when picked up by the children, maimed or killed them. How is Malala able to accuse the army of spending our tax money on confectionaries? Is she talking about Pakistan’s army or the American one?

“It seems that it is only when dozens of schools have been destroyed and hundreds others closed down that the army thinks about protecting them. Had they conducted their operations here properly, this situation would not have arisen.”

How can she assess how properly or improperly the army did its job unless she was in the company of critical tongues?

“Muslim Khan (a Swat Taleban spokesman) has said that those schools housing the army would be attacked. We will be more afraid of having the army in our schools than ever.”

She clearly wants the army out of Swat which the Americans would never want since they want our army to do their dirty laundry in Pakistan’s backyard.

“I switched the channel and a woman was saying ‘we will avenge the murder of Benazir Bhutto’. I asked my father who would avenge the deaths of hundreds of people of Swat.”

What a wonderful question that must make the hearts of Benazir’s murderers and the killers of Pakistani citizens pound faster!

“My father prepared breakfast today because my mum is not feeling well. Here women have to wear a veil - called a shuttle veil - whenever they leave their homes. My mother also wore one but I refused to wear one on the grounds that I found it difficult to walk with it on.”

Clearly, Malala seems like an obstinate child who disregards danger. In The New York Times documentary she is shown walking to the school with a blue rucksack and shown entering with a black one? What wonderful editing done in New Amsterdam (later renamed New York) by the creators of 9/11 who proved their city exceled at poor editing!

Malala refers to her mother as ‘mum’ which is being totally British. The translator does not use the Urdu words ammi or amma that Pakistanis use when addressing their mothers. She later switches to ‘mom’ which shows that more than one confused person translated or created the bogus text.

“One of my brothers told my father he wanted to make an atomic bomb.”

Now this is the mother of all giveaways, and exactly what the nuclear-capable six-pointed Star of David wants: disarmament of Pakistan’s nuclear arsenal by creating global panic. Thanks God, Albert Einstein and Julius Robert Oppenheimer were not Muslim nuclear scientists, and down with Satan whose legions of demons rule over Hollywood unveiling future plans for the world and propaganda disguised as entertainment. The American raiders of the lost spark have always insisted that Pakistani weapons of crass destruction ‘could fall into the hands of al-Qaeda’—as if our bombs were hand-grenades ready for immediate use launch from camel-backs.

“People believe more in what the militants say rather than the government.”

She has lost her innocence and playfulness by growing up very soon. The military, the government and her agencies need to find out what she means by this observation. If the public rejects official truths, something must be seriously wrong with the public. Sheikh Rasheed’s days as political soothsayer are over. Roll over Beethoven and tell Tschaikowsky the news; Malala can outdo anybody in news analysis and political commentary.

“I went to lie down with my father but then went to my mother, but could not sleep.”

Muslim boys and girls beyond ten years of age do not lie down with their fathers, as prescribed by a Hadith (saying) attributed to the Messenger of Allah):

Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-Asr, narrated that the prophet of Allah said, "…and arrange their beds (to sleep) separately." (Abu Dawud)

“Maulana Fazlullah (a pro-Taleban cleric) came on his radio and kept crying for a long time. He was demanding an end to the military operation.”

What one-sided battle was the army fighting in Swat? Had the army wanted to end an operation which displaced three million people, they could have jammed the mullah’s mobile FM station. Who provided the mullah with this undetectable loudspeaker?

“Most suicide attacks take place either on Friday mornings or on Friday evenings. They [Taliban] also say that the reason behind this is because the suicide attacker thinks that Friday has a special importance in Islam and carrying out such attacks on this day will please God more.” 

This is pure non-sense. It is not what the suicide bomber thinks, it is what his handler thinks and brainwashes him with. It is the afternoon prayer that attracts the most Muslims to mosques on Fridays; the rest of the four prayers attract less people.

“The Taleban have lifted restrictions on girls' primary education - therefore they are also attending schools. In our school there is co-education until primary level.”

Throughout her diary, Malala notes the odd ever-changing tactics: imposition of a ban, then its lifting, then a ban, and again its lifting. The Taliban are portrayed as undecided about co-education and girl’s education.

“In my school, only a total of 70 pupils attended out of 700 students who are enrolled.”

Since her father owned the school she went to, she heard all things at the dinner table. It shows she paid attention to the business end of it while being under so much stress.

“People do not leave their homeland on their own free will, only poverty or a lover usually makes you leave so rapidly.”

What an amazing observation? And now that she is abroad under Her Majesty’s wing, she has proved that it was poverty and being in love with her foreign sponsor that made her leave Pakistan. Has she not been awarded profusely by both foreign and local organizations and adored freely by strangers?

With a shameless smile on his face, ousted Prime Minister Yousaf Raza Gilani remarked when a CNN interviewer alleged that ‘a third of Pakistanis wish to leave their country’, “And why don’t they leave then; who is stopping them?”

But on 19 June 2012, God’s Justice prevailed and ‘Useless Razor’ Gilani, through a landmark Supreme Court judgement was stripped of his post, disqualified and then ousted. He is gone but those he wished harm are still here, and this is precisely the point: the system discourages people who wish to make a positive change and shows them the yellow brick road of foreign shores.

Not one Pakistani, who has caused the brain drain and the flight of capital from Pakistan, has ever impressed with his lame excuses for settling abroad. Only self-delusion and a shameless denial of Allah’s gifts bestowed in abundance upon Pakistan can make one a turncoat. As the ‘poet of the East’, Allama Muhammad Iqbal, correctly assessed:

Not hopeless is Iqbal of his barren field
Only some moisture, and this soil is very fertile, O server.

Even apparently sensible middle-class families exceed the desire of the poor when it comes to settling abroad. And young Malala claiming that eloping with lovers is one of our national requirements needs to be totally disregarded by the Taliban but noted with concern seriousness by her father.

“The Taleban say that they use FM radio to propagate teachings of the Koran but commander Khalil after a brief teaching of the Koran subtly switches over to threaten opponents.”

When grownup Muslims are shy of reading a translated Qur’an and cannot differentiate between the shades of Ahadith (sayings attributed to the Messenger of Allah), how can young Malala appreciate the subtleties? How does she know what parts are from the Qur’an and when a switchover to deviant philosophy has taken place?

“Girls called out to the soldiers and they waved back. Soldiers seem to be tired of waving now.”

Is she out on the roof or in the streets with her friends, shouting and waving at helicopters? The soldiers always look stern; how can she tell if they are tired of their institution or the assigned duties? Not imagined ‘tired’ expressions but only bigger boots can evict smaller boots.

“My brother often prays "O God bring peace to Swat and if not then bring either the US or China here.’”

Now this is a mouthful coming from a very young boy! I know a million souls who wish to be taken over by America (just as their ancestors were purchased by the British East India Company’s Red Coats) but to have China in here is being a Communist—something the Taliban have already accused her of being. Why would Malala ask for an American takeover unless she craves for their toys, toffees, awards and that mind-numbing Green Card?

“Today we played a lot in class and enjoyed ourselves like we used to before.”

She appears to think that classrooms are for playing, not for studying.

“There was a time when I used to like wearing the burqa (full-body veil for women) but not anymore.”

Notice how she contradicts her earlier statement of refusing to wear it!

“They (the Taliban) say that they want to take revenge for Jamia Hafsa and the Red Mosque, but we are not the ones responsible for what happened there so why don't they take revenge on people who are responsible?”

Is she advocating that other citizens of Pakistan be killed when, in this fake global war on terror (against Islam and Muslims), everybody knows who the real enemy is?

In conclusion

As is apparent, words have been put into a youth’s mouth. Malala’s inner voice is already strong; she is at risk of being implanted in England with a stronger device in the head. Mind control is big business for those who attempt to play God while truly being minions of the devil. Our girl has already spilled her beans, her diary is surely written by an expert spin-doctor, translated mostly by an educated Urdu Service staff of BBC and frequently ruined by someone who scored all D’s in the GCSE exams.

With the Taliban’s non-lethal gift surgically removed from her head, the brain oedema cured, the ventilator off, our girl appears as if nothing ever happened on 9 October 2012.

There are wheels within wheels. Malala is surely a matryoshka doll with layer upon layer of painted wooden existence. We need to verify the diary’s originality by cross questioning the girl, analysing the handwriting of the source Urdu material through forensics and DNA-testing. If the Chief Justice is not too busy with taking suo moto notices, he may enquire into the case to make the findings public. Besides, what good is a Russian doll if her layers cannot be explored?

Do not forget to comment here on this very important issue, and do come back for a more revealing Malala Yousaf Zai: Attack Of The Babbling Tongues (part-II)

©Tahir Gul Hasan, 2012


References and acknowledgements
For photos copied from various sources, I thank the original photographers and news agencies.
This is 2012. Interior Minister, Rahman Malik, has blocked YouTube in Pakistan; he needs more skin-whitening cream to render him 'fair' to the tired public.

Here are the BBC’s Gul Makai blogs that first attracted awards and later bullets for Malala:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7834402.stm#blq-main
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7848138.stm
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7861053.stm
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7881255.stm
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7889120.stm?oo=10000906
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7928752.stm?oo=10000906

Watch Yousuf Raza Gilani make a complete fool of himself on CNN.
Dawn reports Yousuf Raza is sent packing
MNA Mussarat Ahmadzeb alleges attack on Malala was 'scripted'