Thursday, 10 March 2011

Alphabet For Politically-Incorrect Children

Dear grownups, sit back and let the children enjoy the new alphabet which took us so many decades of American intervention to develop!

A: army, aid, American (interests, ambassador), Ayub (Khan, the military DICK-tator)
B: boot, bomb, barbed-(wire), beheading, budget 
C: collateral (damage), C-in-C, CIA, court, chief(-justice), cartoons (of Prophet Muhammad)
D: drone, Defence (Housing Authority), debt, Dollar, DICK-tator
E: emergency, explosive, economic (sanctions)
F: FBI, fauj, flag-burning, flood, fundamentalist, flour (shortage)
G: Guantenamo (Bay), global (war of error or G-WOE), general, Green-(Card)
H: headquarter, hand grenade, halwa, hides (of sacrificial animals)
I: intelligence, ISI, Islamist, insurgent, IED (improvised explosive device), IMF, inflation
J: jacket (for suicide bombers), journalist, judge, Jew,
K: Kargil, KHAD, KGB
L: load-shedding, letter-bomb, lawyer, lota
M: medal, militant, miswaak, Muslim League (A,N and F), MOSSAD
N: nuclear, no-fly (zone), 9/11
O: Osama (bin Laden), operation
P: Plotocracy (diplomacy through plot allotments to cronies), Pentagon (pants-are-gone)
Q: (al)-Qaeda, Qur'an
R: RAW, rocket-launcher, regime-(change)
S: suicide-(jacket), Siachin, sugar (shortage), stoning (to death), Shariah law, security situation
T: Taliban, torture, terrorist, tax
U: USA, U.N.O, ultra-orthodox, underworld
V: visa (American), veto, veteran (of American crimes against humanity)
W: Washington, Waziristan, WMD, World (Bank), water-boarding
X: X-Ray (camp at Guantanamo Bay)
Y: Yankee
Z: Zionism, Zia-ul-Haq (the military DICK-tator)

21 comments:

TGH said...

Feel free to add more words to this glorious achievement!

Anonymous said...

Loved this Taahir... especially 'pants are gone', a sad and bitter reflection of the world we live in, and a true mirror of times to come... am lucky to have this blog to delve into when my eyes are far too clouded by rosy tints. Excellent read.

Samragi

TGH said...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Sam! Nothing like a reality check!
Stay tuned, Rosy Tints.
Thanks for resting here for a laugh...!

aukhabutt said...

what rozy tits u be talkin bout sir jeee . .?
i aslo laaf too much reedin new ulfabet u make here ... ufff. ...haha'a .. .

Tayyiba said...

Thats Hilarious. I Enjoyed reading it. Shukar hay smajh mein aagya otherwise I have not enough wisdom to go through heavy words.
All the best always!!!

TGH said...

Aukha, you clown, at least read the interactor's ENGLISH before you start tripping all over Shakespeare's grave. You will be watched closely...

TGH said...

Hey Tayyaba! Long time no see! Where have you been. Anyway, its nice to see you HERE laughing away.
And why haven't you read the previous blog and acted upon the advice?

existence said...

Nice one TGH, remindes me of NFPs writing on TV couple of years back.

Been a while I know, many reasons for being out of site, trying to get back to normality though :)

cheers.

Bilal

TGH said...

Billy Boy, what a nice sir-prize, what's your existence like these days?
I'm doing very well, tumhari dua say!
Yara, Pakland ao tay mulaqaat shareef karo na! :)

existence said...

well my existance took me to places but looks like I will be here for a while now, i.e agar kabhi jahazon ka rukh sydney ki taraf howa to "jee ayan nuu" :)

meena said...

Very Interesting Tahir..funny as well as Sarcastic...

TGH said...

Billy, Dubai mein to mulaqaat kee nahi, abb Ass-tralia mein kahan? Anyway, thanks for your offer. :)

TGH said...

Meena jee, thanks! Ae tuhaday jae paRhay-likhay lokaN wastay hi tay likhiaya ae maiN!

Anonymous said...

Takh haqikat..my view......all these alphabets....kids should not read...not follow....not iplement....except one i.e ..Qu'ran..follow love for countrymen and all humanity...this is my wish for my hamsaya mulk
raj kumar chhabra

TGH said...

Thanks Raj Kumar jee, for wishing your neighbours well. :)

sumeraamir said...

Well, It is really interesting no doubt but sad too....and I hope one day we will be able to change all the alphabets into a positive and a genuine manners, so that we would be able to feel proud to make our generation to Learn the true meanings of all these alphabets..! Insh'Allah

TGH said...

Thanks for your kind wishes and comments, SA! Never lose hope! :))

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